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Category: #the human bondage

Workshop: Rope bondage for bodyworkers (2020)

Do you want to include rope bondage in your sessions?

How do you dominate someone while still serving them professionally?

What are the seven keys to making a stranger trust you and surrender?

I’ve been developing my therapeutic rope bondage for the past ten years. I often meet bodyworkers that have discovered the power of bondage in my festival workshops and decided to include it in their session, with great success. But I get the questions, what to do in this and that situation, so I decided to do this two-day workshop dedicated to session givers.

Ritual: The surrendered masculine (2020)

In a traditional tantric relationship, there is the sexual polarity between the masculine and the feminine. The masculine oscillates between serving and dominating, while the feminine between surrendering and submitting. There is no strict connection to physical gender, or what one has between their legs. However, there is a risk of getting stuck in one polarity, and that can be very draining. I believe that every person need spaces to serve, dominate, surrender, and submit. That means to act out both their masculine and feminine.

Listening, the first step to domination (2020)

Lately, I’ve been practicing a Taoist tea ceremony, and my teacher talks a lot about the relationship between space and content. I very much find myself to be a content-first person. That means that whenever I have some space, in my schedule or my environment, I tend to fill it with content. If there are five minutes until I’m meeting a friend for coffee, then I take the chance to watch another snippet of a Youtube video that has been open in a tab since forever. However, I also notice that this has slowly been changing since I left my career job five years ago. There are less furniture in my home, less cloth in my wardrobe, and less clutter in general.

Tying a man (2020)

I’m always very curios about what people experience when tied by me. I had two sessions with this man about a year ago, and he wrote about it on his blog The Integrated Man Blog. After asking, he allowed me to crosspost it here, if he could remain anonymous. So the man on the picture is not the author of the text. Anyhow, thank you for the trust and here is his story.

Bondage and beauty (2020)

For me, beautiful and gratitude is deeply connected. I experience this when I get the chance to pause for a movement and marvel in the grandness of life. It brings me presence, and the longer that I can stay present, the more details are revealed to my awareness. Therefore in my bondage, I believe that the more I can perfect details by seeing them, the more beautiful my results will be. The connection to presence is essential because a specific knot is only pleasing when it is in the “right” movement – that is transient, elusive, and ever-changing. Therefore there is no pattern to beauty, and there is no beauty in patterns. Instead, the key is to practice presence and perfection. And I know it is “right” when I feel gratitude.

How to take good bondage pictures (2020)

I often get compliments on my photos of rope bondage. People say that they display a sort of vulnerability and melancholy, that is both haunting and beautiful. And I usually reply, without thinking too much, that is because I took them during a session. So what is this session? Bluntly expressed, it is when the attention changes from a pattern to a person to a relationship.

Touching the symbolic body (2020)

This weeks musing is kind of a continuation of Four languages of power, as it asks – how can touch be a symbol for so much. I first got in contact with this idea of the symbolic body after leaving my career job to study medical massage therapy. Before this, touch had almost always been sexual for me, especially when involving naked people. I remember having massive anxiety in our school’s clinic when working with neck-and-shoulder pains. To help a patient long term, one needs to release the pectoralis minor muscle, and my problem was that this muscle sits under the breast on a female body. I quickly learnt the difference between touching the skin to arouse a partner, and simply moving an impractical piece of meat covering a tiny but very tense muscle.

A longing for belonging (2020)

This weekend I participated in an online gathering called “The Orgasmic and Loving Couple”. My contribution was to be part of a rope bondage performance. So I started to write about the theme to understand it, and the word that became most salient to me was “couple”, in the spirit of, being two instead of one. This enables a whole range of experiences when one can relate to something outside of themselves. Something that gives feedback and that is not an object, but a subject equal to oneself–usually this a person, or an animal. There is a form of currency involved, one that symbolizes the value of being a “couple” and that is trust.

While we are falling (2020)

To surrender is to fall.
To fall in trust, that we will be caught, by another, or by life.
We arch our spine out of balance, to where we lose control.
Backwards into the unknown. To the place that we can’t see.
We expose our heart, our neck, and our belly, as symbols of trust.
We are vulnerable, but yet strong.
We are suspended in time – forever falling.